I just don’t know where to turn to at this point and here probably isn’t the best place but I can’t really tell anybody what I’ve done, I haven’t stopped crying for the past hour because I’m disgusted with my behaviour. To be honest I don’t really need to be called names (I know what…
Do not tell your bf when he gets home, it could turn explosive. The complications of your actions have yet to pan out so cross one bridge at a time. You don’t need to commit yourself to never telling your bf but some time does need to pass so you can make a clearer decision. I would also talk with his father & mention what I told you or at least ask him to keep this confidence also & let it be your decision to spill the beans, not his. If you don’t wait on this you might have your bf acting in haste as well as his dad (you don’t want a further disaster). In the mean time you need the downtime to pull back & see it for what it was. I can’t tell you what that is & I don’t know if you can make that judgment right now . I certainly don’t think your a “slut”, but impressionable & vulnerable due your age & the not so easy time you’ve been experiencing with your bf. I’m at an age where i’d ask if the sex was good LOL, just some humor not meant to offend. We live & we learn & sometimes a lie even unspoken it there for a reason…so as not to inconvenience another. Take a fresh look at things down the road. It’s also a red flag that the love you have for your bf needs some self-inner intervention. If your not appreciated your not loving yourself. I wish you a better journey, even if it meant you & the father have a deeper connection ( no way, you would say ) stranger things have happened & no i’m not suggesting you go that way. Certainly not now & not with his son as your bf. I don’t know the father, don’t know if he took advantage of your predicament or if he has geniune feelings for you other then lust, affection & sympathy. Though your not married what you both did broke some rules. He didn’t validate ones commitment of being a father. You cheated on your bf who happens to be his father. If you find yourself thinking about his dad, you can’t just switch either. I’m just throwing out a few what if’s, & again not trying to polarize the situation further. Also relieze that holding on to this to long can exaperate the issue as would going back for 2nds & thirds. If you can maturely & mutually keep this a secret between you & his dad without turning the guilt into the wrack you feel now. If you do say something, I would still wait & simply say I cheated with some random guy I met. Remind yourself they have a bond for life. At no point in this post did I recomend you have an affair or cheat again w/him (just want to be CLEAR). But I do want you to understand the attention he gave you could take over if your not firmly grounded. Wishing you the best
wow, that’s like in a movie! I feel really bad for you 🙁 I think the whole problem is that the realtionship with your bf isn’t the best, like even his father said! So, maybe you shouldn’t tell your boyfriend that you had sex with his father, who knows maybe he will beat you or whatever, I don’t know what you mean with he doens’t treat like he should. If it wouldn’t be like that I would definetly tell him. Because…if your realtionship really is a good one and he loves you he doesn’t want to know that the day before you marry…so I would tell him and see how he reacts. Maybe he wants to stay away from you a while, but if he really loves you he will come back. That’s hard, but you’ve done a mistake and it was your choice. But if your bf is that bad it doesn’t even matter, than just leave him and look after someone you deserve. But what’s really important I think is that the wife of your boyfriends father knows that!!!! She will maybe hate you, but it’s better when you tell her as if she gets it told by somebody else. And I wouldn’t tell it nobody as you said, because things like that always get discovered….but I fell soooo sorry for the horrible time your having 🙁
If you don’t wanna tell it right away to your bf or somebody then first try to tell it to your best girlfriend or something, she will understand you and be there for you and maybe she has some ideas too and can even help you better since she knows all the involved persons. But don’t just tell nobody that will kill you from inside…imagine to live with it the rest of your life! Hope I helped you and I wish you a lot of luck.
Wow, that’s huge. But in your defense he is 56 and i think was taaking advantage of you. I mean a 56 year old father of your boyfrindd new it was wrong and should have stopped it. You should have too, but I can understand how nice it is to have a shoulder to cry on…you were in a vulnerable state. If you relationship is “not a healthy one” than think about you, what you want and start the process of moving on.Although I don’t agree with what happened and since it affects so many people, do you think it would wise to tell all? Good luck sweety…
What a situation to be in!
Firstly-a guy will NEVER forgive his gf for sleeping with his Dad!!! I mean that is prob the worst person it could have happened with.
Secondly- if you don’t tell anyone and carry on as normal, are you going to be able to be the same around his dad?? Surely he must notice the atmosphere or something at some point?
I think the guilt of this would drive me up the wall.
And if you love your bf so much you should finish it with him and move on. I know it will be hard for you- but you cant carry on in this relationship with that in your head. Every time his dad looks at you, wont you think he’s thinking of discusting things??
No,, I would finish it with your bf and give him a diff excuse.
Hope you sort this out!
You said it … “me and my boyfriend have been having a lot of problems lately it’s not a very healthy relationship to be honest.” There ya go … Break up with this reasoning … never tell a soul and never see either your bf or his father again. Learn from this and never do it again. It is definitely NOT healthy. Move on and don’t hurt anyone further. Be a BIg person about this.
Coming from someone who has been cheated on and not told i can tell you that if he is a cluey person he will sense something is up even if you do try and hide it. Guilt is a very hard emotion to disguise and betrayal (with me it was my girl and best mate) will not be easy for you or his dad to hide either! Not an easy situation and i dont envy or (and no offence intended) feel sorry for you but you really screwed up and no matter what your man will find out so its really up to you now when and how that happens! Good luck your gonna need it! Youre in a classic version of a no win situation
if you feel guilt you need to tell. you both made a mistake so you both need to pay for it. even if it does ruin his marriage and your relationship you both made the mistake. if you both would do something like that then it is both of your fault and you have to take that risk. wouldn’t you want to know if your mom slept with your boyfriend. if you think you can hold it in then you can try but it’s going to hurt a lot more later.
honestley, i don’t think the guilt will ever go away if you stay with him. yes you love your boyfriend, but things are different now and will never be the same. i think you should make a clean break from both of them and just try and find yourself. nobody should be that unhappy. there’s no reason to tell him, just break up with him…sorry.
holy fricking crap. this better be fake.
&& your right, you shouldnt ask these things on here, people can be even more mean than me.
its up to you- you could tell your boyfriend, then you get dumped & he can be disgusted for the rest of his life.
or you can not say anything, and live your miserable life being sad-and thinking oh my god why the hell did i do that.
up to you.
I bet I could guess what region of the country you are from…It’s not as if I’ve never heard of this situation…Still just the thought of it really makes me nauseous