No. Men and women should NOT be “friends” with members of the opposite sex. PERIOD! Casual work relationships are fine, double dating with other couples is fine but a married person hanging out with, calling, etc… a member of the opposite sex is NOT cool.
Just a tip – Men NEVER just want o be friends with a woman unless she is totally ugly. Even then they would most likely bang her if she offered it up. Men do NOT call, e-mail, spend time with women they don’t want to have sex with even if they say otherwise or the woman doesn’t want them.
Ok “Ash”, you don’t just get divorced because the friends have been there longer. If you have a stronger bond with your friends than you do with your husband, you have no business being married. I know your entitled to your opinion, but marriage is sacred and it just frustrates me when people take it so lightly. Sorry in advance 🙂
Now….for my advice, I don’t think married men should remain friends with ex-girlfriends IF it makes you uncomfortable. He should respect you and your feelings. On the other hand if this relationship he had with the ex was a small fling and ended quickly, then why not? Of course if they’re talking on the phone at night and going places together, thats unacceptable, but if they’re just civil when they run into each other then let it go. Acting jealous could cause your husband to rebel.
As for being friends with women in general, friends have no color or gender. True friends are hard to find and if the ones your husband have are female then he’s lucky he found some at all. Just make sure he remembers this when you associate with your male friends. If he acts jealous with you, he may be having some guilt feelings. Every situation is different and you have to look at all the details. Good luck!
Very sensitive subject. I think you can be friends with the opposite sex probably not with an ex. I think though that it is very important for the husband or wife to meet the friend. If not sometimes go out with this friend with you spouse. I have female friends but we are just that nothing more. The minute they even think of being more than friends that is when we are no longer friends. I wont risk my marriage for that.
Ex grilfriends…eh…no thats not the best idea. Cause what if either has feelings for each other. Not good.
But with females in general, yeah! Why would they want to be friends with just guys and their wives? If they dont have any/ if they dont want to then its okay. But if someone is stopping them then the person stopping them is wrong.
I don’t think its right for him to be “friends” with ex-girlfriends. Now, if they occasionally see each other in the grocery store, and just say hello and go on, then I think its okay…just because they don’t have to go through the whole awkward silence “I know your there but won’t talk to you” thing. Now, with that aside, I think it is perfectly fine for a married man to have “acquaintances” with other women, for example, in the workplace…they see them everyday so its kind of weird not to, but I personally don’t think that a man should have another woman friend that he trusts in other than his wife and/or mother and/or sister. The reason I say this is because men who tell other women what is going on in their lives, well most women will tell the man what they want to hear. For example: “My wife wouldn’t have sex with me last night. Its not fair.” Well, she might have been on her period, or had a bad day, or something. But the women would tell her, “Aw, she shouldn’t have done that.” And since the women agrees with the man, he feels like he is more bonded to her and can trust her with more things. Sooner or later he is wishing he was with her instead of his wife. So, like I said, I think like casual acquaintances are okay, but it shouldn’t go any further than that.
This is touchy subject. It depends on how long they were together, how long since the break up, why they broke up, how the new girlfriend feels about it, how long they have been friends, etc. I personally dont want to be friends with any of my X’s. My husband would not feel comfortable with it either. That part of my life is over.
To “Truth Hurts”……….I seriously question your “group” of friends and acquaintances. I have a very large circle of friends and can only think of one who has cheated on his wife. They are far too moral and respect the vows that they took with their wives when they married. I guess I am in the the “other” 50% of people who take marriage seriously. NOT ALL men cheat.
I don’t think he should be friends with his ex girlfriends. As long as I know his female friends than its ok.
not “talk on the fone get together for lunch” friends, but if their paths cross, then the occasional conversation is not a big deal… my man is still friendly with some of his ex’s.. one of them does my hair and i get a discount because of it, so its not so bad… females in general, same thing.. i have guy friends, and i will go and hang with them, but only if i have my best girl friend with me, and my man knows… and only if i have first invited him to come too.. i will only go alone if he cant come.. i would never go over without letting him know or if we were able to have time to hang out together… and i really like my guy friend.. he’s cool, very respectful and comfortable to be around.. but, i am madly in love with my man, so nothing would ever happen… on the ohter hand, i have been friends withthis guy since high school.. so its kinda cruel to try and sever that relationship… but, again, i wouldnt go to lunch or dinner with this guy, just me and him… thats not cool!
i dont mind the close female friends my bf has had before i met him, and always been open about his relationship with, this is so and so, we’ve been friends for this long etc…
as for female acquaintances, anything more than a hello, how are u in passing, i have an issue with…and new female friends, no
as for friends with ex-gf’s, no way…that ship has sailed, let it go
the bottom line is, u should be most important to him, therefore staying within ur comfort zone is not too much to ask for to limit ex-gf contact and female contact…
even with my bf’s close female friends, he only has one or two, he does NOT talk about initimate details of our relationship, to me thats cheating, u want to talk to a woman heart to heart, u talk to me
but everyone is diff, its what ur comfortable with, someone else’s opinoin who is diff is not going to make u comfortable