Hard core Christians: So, my girlfriend and I are both non-religious. I am a definite atheist, she tends more agnostic, but she is a totally rational person, who believes in science. I turned 17 in April, she will turn 17 in September. (Despite that, I promise this is a real, intellectual question.)
True Christians view sex as a way of being able to manifest their love for one another in a physical way. To view it any other way would not be love, but lust. Love is understanding, faithful, kind, long suffering, eager to please, and knows when to say “enough”. Whereas lust never knows when to say “enough”. Lust is self serving and only wants to gratify self. The God that true Christians serve has given sex as a gift that also serves as a method that allows us to procreate, which is what he wants us to do, in a way that is enjoyable and fulfilling to both parties involved. True Christians believe that sex should only be between a man and a woman who have a covenant of marriage. And yes, our emotions are strongly connected to the physical act of sex, because sex is what consummates our covenant. The God we serve operates through blood covenants and so in like manner so do we. In the act of sex there is a transference of bodily fluids which include, but not limited to, blood. Most people view blood not just as a scientific matter by which all life is sustained, but morally blood is what is also seen as what connects people scientifically and otherwise and makes them family. Blood creates relationship. True Christians have relationship with God through the love He has for us through the innocent shed blood of His son Jesus, and married Christians have a relationship with each other born out of love for one another through the shared blood of covenant consummated through sex. This is why we equate love with sex. If we operated purely out of lust we would not be able to concentrate or appreciate each others personality or intelligence; and I think whether Christian or not we can all agree that these are the things that attract us to a person that can result in a relationship of love.
Try not having sex. You will soon find that the absence of sex has a negative effect on your relationship. The fact that you are comfortable with each other and appear to have a deep intellectual connection is a fantastic indication of how great your relationship is. Sex is an important biological function, and the emotional aspect of it can be either very real with emotional people or non-existent with non-emotional people. If it does not bother either of you, then I don’t see a problem. The problem arises when an emotional person is in a relationship with a non-emotional person. This has nothing to do with religious beliefs either. There are plenty of emotional non-religious people and vice versa.
Honestly? No, it doesn’t disrupt my relationship with my husband. We both know when to cool it. I love having an emotional connection with him in the bedroom. It makes sex more meaningful, in my opinion, and for me, sex isn’t just something people do.
I had relationships similar to what you describe. I didn’t like it. I felt there was something missing. If it works for you, great, but it didn’t work for me.
People see it in different lights, I find your way of looking and feeling about it interesting though…. But, I can ONLY speak for myself, not others on this matter… And my out look on it all is different than a lot, but I know there are others, because of my back ground.. It is interconnected to the LOVE I have for my husband.. I can not separate one act of love from another, they are so intertwined… LOVE is LOVE to me.. It took a while, because of my back ground, to find out just what true love was and is.. To put it all in simple terms I could NOT make love to my husband with out the emotional and deep understanding I have of love with him.. Just being an *act* was and is in my past… and it was empty and soul killing….. I do not know about other peoples *married* life, but mine is, like I said, so intertwined with all the other stuff, sex, etc., that separating it is impossible…. go in peace… God bless
In all seriousness…there is no way you are a 17 year old boy…
it is scientific fact, when a 17 year old boy is alone with a 17 year old girl they are driven by one thing and it isn’t intellect…
You don’t seem to know the kind of sex that the Bible people used to have… You can read it in the Bible and come up with a point of reference
Jesus comes from a long line of polygamist and incestuous forbears. Any Mormon can tell you that! Leah paid in DRUGS to her own sister Rachel to buy SEX from their common husband Jacob. Jacob and Leah became ancestors of Jesus in the first ever recorded DRUGS FOR SEX DEAL in the Bible! Jacob was married to BOTH SISTERS! Jacob was having 3some sex in bed with both sisters at the same time. Leah wanted a more private sexual session with their common husband Jacob so she paid in drugs to her dominatrix sister Rachel! THEY WERE DOING DRUGS AND SEX ALL IN JACOB’S FAMILY INCLUDING THEIR CHILDREN! God had Jacob renamed, ISRAEL! The Jews named their country after this man! I am not saying that Jacob’s family was a bunch of junkies! According to the Bible writers, they were all HOLY PEOPLE OF GOD!
Marrying girls of the same family in Israel is enforced in God’s law (Num 36:8)! King David is also an ancestor of the alleged Jewish Messiah. Among his many wives he was married to Michal and God personally added Michal’s mom to his collection of wives! King David had 3some sex in bed with mother and daughter at the same time! (2 Sam 12:8)! Christians are very picky in what they want to believe from the Bible. Anything detrimental to their faith is totally ignored! In the New Testament Church at Corinth, Greece a young man was having sexual intercourse with his own mother and THE WHOLE CHURCH WAS VERY PROUD OF IT! (1 Cor 5:1-2) Saint Paul didn’t damn the mother at all for having sex with her own son. He reprimanded ONLY the son who was probably still a teenager. Saint Paul trashed the OT Law (Lev 20:11)! Now, Christians are opposed to same sex marriage, only to have one more “sin” to service!
Amazingly, we still have this SEX for DRUGS deal in the Bible that no Preacher cares to talk about, but it is only today! If Christianity is to survive, soon a lot of preachers will be making a living regulating same sex marriage, abortions, and so on. Now, the Pope is banning even the use of condoms to prevent AIDS. Catholics are promoting pregnancies at ALL COST so they can send the ladies to Heaven when they die (I Tim 2:14-15)!
Genesis 30:15-16 (NIV) But she* (*Leah) said to her, “Wasn’t it enough that you took away my husband? Will you take my son’s mandrakes too?” “Very well,” Rachel said, “he can sleep with you tonight in return for your son’s mandrakes”* (*Wikipedia, “mandrake” is a hallucinogenic drug plant. Some preachers insist that it used to heal sterility in Bible times! The fact in the story is that Leah’s young son knew how and where to get drugs as needed! BTW, naming your daughter RACHEL can be a discreet turn on for some wacky Christians that read the Bible! There is hardly any LEAH, even though she is the ancestor of Jesus!). So when Jacob came in from the fields that evening, Leah went out to meet him. “You must sleep with me,” she said. “I have hired you with my son’s mandrakes.” SO HE SLEPT WITH HER THAT NIGHT* (*it’s “all in the family!”).
For an “Intelligent Designer God” this Bible God is very smutty! Don’t you think so?
When Rachel moved away from her father’s home she stole all her parents’ dildos! Dildos were commonly used in those days especially in big polygamist families like King Solomon’s. He had over 1,000 wives and live-in lovers with full benefits to please sexually! He is not listed in the Guinness Book of Records only because there is not a shred of evidence in the world that he ever existed! The Bible writers say that GOD made King Solomon the “WISEST MAN EVER TO SET FOOT ON THIS EARTH!” (1 Kin 2:12) Not even Jesus Christ was that wise! For over 300 Bible years the Temple of Solomon was a shrine of male and female prostitutes servicing God’s Holy People! (2 Kin 23:7) God NEVER objected until a prude King Josiah freaked out in desperation, and the Jews ended up in slavery, anyway!
Genesis 31:19, 34-35 (NIV) When Laban had gone to shear his sheep, Rachel stole her father’s household gods* (*dildos in the form of idols). [34-35] Now Rachel had taken the household gods and put them inside her camel’s saddle* (*spiritually speaking!) and was sitting on them* (*It would have been very disrespectful to any venerable “household God” to have somebody sitting on them, but that’s what they were made for!). Laban searched through everything in the tent but found nothing. Rachel said to her father* (*in a moaning voice), “Don’t be angry, my lord, that I cannot stand up in your presence; I’m having my period.”* (*she was probably very juicy, but not of blood! Even so she was still unclean and untouchable -Lev 15! In Islam teenage girls have their clitoris carved out so they won’t get juicy, and play with dildos!) So he searched but could not find the household gods* (*the Bible is FULL OF KINKY STUFF like that!).
Ezekiel 16:17 (NIV) You also took the fine jewelry I gave you, the jewelry made of my gold and silver, and you made for yourself male idols* (*DILDOS made of gold!) and engaged in prostitution with them!* (*Joyce Meyer has a fetish for gold toilet accessories, too!)
Prostitution is not a significant “sin” at all if practiced to favor God’s Holy causes! Rahab was a professional Prostitute who committed high treason against her own Palestinian country! She lied to the police to protect the Jewish spies who came to spend the night with her. She made it into the Holy Heroes Hall of Fame (Heb 11)! She will preserve her title of a RIGHTEOUS PROSTITUTE FOR EVER! It’s all in the Bible!
Hebrews 11:31 (KJV) By faith the PROSTITUTE* (*not ex-prostitute, but the prostitute!) Rahab, because she welcomed the spies, was not killed with those who were disobedient* (*Rahab honestly didn’t know what was going on, if she ever existed! She poured her heart out for a decent trick and suddenly she is a hero of the CHRISTIAN faith! Even today, some very worthy male and female prostitutes are known to have been very kind to world famous preachers like Jimmy Swaggart, Ted Haggard and so many others! They ought to be added to the list of Christian heroes of the faith along with Rahab!).
James 2:25 (KJV) In the same way, was not even Rahab THE PROSTITUTE* (*not the ex-prostitute, but THE PROSTITUTE!) considered RIGHTEOUS for what she did when she gave lodging to the spies and sent them off in a different direction (Joshua 2:1-3, 6:17-25).
The idea that a prostitute REPENTS of her “sins” and wishes to forget her “sinful” life is practically unheard of in the Bible! Jesus NEVER healed any prostitute craving for more tricks. In Fact, Jesus favor the prostitutes and the gays over his own people, the Jews!!!
Matthew 21:31b (KJV) Jesus said to them* (*Jews), “I tell you the truth, the tax collectors and THE PROSTITUTES* (*not ex-prostitutes, but THE PROSTITUTES!) are* (*not WILL enter, but ARE) entering the kingdom of God ahead of YOU* (*there is no need for Jesus to have died on the Holy Cross for the prostitutes! They were entering the Kingdom of God already, but Christianity still insists that Jesus needs to be nailed to the Holy Cross just to make sure so THEY can go to Heaven when THEY die!).
Matthew 11:24 0(KJV) But I say unto you, That it shall be more tolerable for the land of Sodom in the day of judgment, than for thee* (*NOT A SINGLE BIGOT PREACHER EVER MENTIONS THAT THE SODOMITES OR RATHER GAYS ARE HIGHLY FAVORED ABOVE THE JEWS IN THE BIBLE!)
The Jews don’t mind to let the prostitutes get into Heaven first so they’ll be there when they get there! Today, most Preachers follow a prudish made up morality only because they feel that most Christians in America go for it, but what the Christians and preachers do in the closet is known only when they get caught! So if you have a choice to favor a prostitute, a Sodomite or a Jew, which one would you choose? Hint: WWJD™?
The Bible people were doing the kinkiest drugs and sex all along in the Bible stories. From inhaling the smoke of “burning bushes” to doing some mushroom specialties as depicted by the mushroom shaped bonnets worn by the High Priests of God’s Holy Temple! God prescribed hard liquor offerings to be poured on each sacrifice, too (Num 28:7, Psa 78:65). No wonder the Bible God is so psychedelically oriented!
For at least the first 300 Bible years since it was open for public worship until the days of the homophobic King Josiah* (*?) the Temple of The LORD was housing shrines for male and female prostitutes in Israel. It must have been a pride in anybody’s family to raise a child to become a dedicated prostitute in the Temple of the LORD!
2 Kings 23:7 (NIV) He* (*King Josiah) also tore down the quarters of the male shrine prostitutes* (*male shrine prostitutes were homosexuals servicing God’s people in a way that Christians wouldn’t approve today!), which were in the temple of the LORD…
The Priestly Bible writers made the Temple of Solomon in Jerusalem the ONLY authorized place of worship in Israel! So the most conservative clergypersons, preachers and their families and children have a place to worship God while at the same time male, female, gays and other bizarre prostitutes are servicing the rest of the congregation! It is all in the Bible. It really puts to shame any Pagan place of worship! (1 Cor 5:1-2) Like the old time spiritual goes…
“♫♪ Those were the days…♪♫♪, my friend…♫♪♪”